Desensitized
by Musical Tomboy613
Summary: Korra always feared the day her bending would be ripped from her, but she never imagined it would hurt this bad. She had been desensitized. Some makorra bits thrown in, but mainly korra-centric. K for a mention of suicide. Taken from the tumblr, korra prompts.


For all you people following ' A Century I've been Waiting' , I haven't given up on that story, but my muse has taken a loooooooong vacation and refuses to come back, so I don't want to chance writing without a plot, lest the results be less than desirable. So this will be a one-shot for all of my LoK brothers and sisters until I get my inspiration back. This is the prompt 'de-sensitized' from korraprompts tumblr.  
So, here ya go!

She often thought that losing her bending would be like losing a limb. Those nights when she would stare with wide eyes at the ceiling, afraid and unblinking in case Equalist forces came to kill the part of her that was her life, the skill that made up part of her Avatar duties, her bending. So many sleepless nights, jerking her head towards every little sound like a caged, feral animal,waiting for the moment that the masked nightmare that was Amon came to take away the most important connection she had ever made. She was savvy to the manner in which Amon conducted the act of stripping people of their bending. It wasn't unlike a public execution, because he really did kill an important part of every bender he hurt, taking their special gifts and leaving only a shell of the person behind.

But, now that it had happened to her, the feeling was surreal. It was like a hollow had been made in her chest, because she could no longer even feel the beating of her heart. Her senses, at times, almost completely failed her. She would stumble because black dots grew in her vision and her sense of touch would tell her that there was no longer a ground under her feet to stand on. She still caught smells that weren't really there,fresh dirt being turned up, the salt of the ocean, and the smoke and musk from a dimming fire. In her sleep,she would hear the waves lapping the shore, which melted into rocks hitting each other, and that gave way to the roar of an open fire. When she stuck a spoonful of dinner in her mouth, salt invaded her taste buds and smoke seemed to rise to the roof of her mouth.

While she hated these feelings for reminding her of what she'd lost,she also felt that she couldn't live if they went away, because they offered a phantom feeling that the elements were still deep somewhere inside her, waiting to re-surface again, but held back by a nearly impenetrable wall. But they did go, along with her last vestiges of hope when Katara simply shook her head, a grieved frown on her wrinkled features. That was it then. It was over just like that. No more bending, no more Avatar, and worst of all, no more friends. Though a part of her mind said that she was being ridiculous, and the Krew would never leave her just because she wasn't the Avatar anymore, the depressed part of her quickly put it out, convinced that they were only nice to her because of her status. She walked out of the healing room only to be met with the sad faces of her friends and family. She knew in an instant. She had failed them. Squashed their hopes in the Avatar. With a final word she grabbed her parka and made a brisk walk for Naga. She had been de-sensitized. Robbed of all feeling until there was nothing left but a shell of the brash girl that had lived in her body only a week ago. A spark lit in her heart when Mako confessed his love for her, but her bitterness quickly snuffed it out, not wanting to risk anymore emotional damage and rub salt into a tragic, still bleeding wound. So instead, she ran away like the coward she made herself out to be.

Little comfort was offered by the sharp, frigid winds as they slapped her in the face, seemingly angry at this worthless girl for her failure. So she kept running, not stopping until they came to a place only she knew. A place where she often screamed at the Moon when she was younger, yelling at it for placing what she thought was a curse on her head, the curse of being the Avatar. Now, as she thought back to the harsh words she screamed at her matriarch Spirit, she wanted to jump right then and there, realizing that she had brought this upon herself. Instead, she collapsed and cried like the whelp she thought she was.

A swish caught her ears and she looked up through her hot tears to see the blurry outline of red and yellow robes. Great,more pity. She didn't need to feel anymore weak than she already was. So she turned him away. "Not now Tenzin, I just want to be alone." The voice that answered back was in no way, shape, or form Tenzin's. " But you called me here." Her cerulean eyes snapped up to meet his wise, grey ones. He told her that she had finally connected to her spiritual self."When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change," he said. In that moment, every one of her thousand lifetimes came to stand behind her predecessor, and she realized the divine and grand power she could wield, the regal air she could hold if she just stopped moping like a scolded child.

He put one hand on her forehead and one on her shoulder, and she instantly felt the hollow space in her chest swell up and start beating with the heart of a thousand lifetimes. The elements and the knowledge of how to wield them came rushing back to her, and for a moment, time stood still as she commanded them to bend to her will. When she came down from her high, the world was sharper, every inch and detail visible to her now keen eye. The sounds were clearer than before and she could, with her now heightened senses,feel a presence behind her. She turned and there stood the man she had turned away not even an hour ago. A new and tender spark of love awoke in her heart as she got a running start and jumped into his arms. As she confessed that she too loved him, the spark in her heart grew into a roaring flame, never to be extinguished again, and as their lips met, she truly felt whole and invincible.

~The End~

WHOOHOOO! FINISHED ! So, what did you think? Please comment. Love to hear constructive criticism and praise, but no flames. LUV ya! Bye!


End file.
